Blame Canada
A Christopher McMichaels Story
The video opens with a title card showing that it is currently 5:34 p.m. on the day of
AMA Manifest Destiny backstage at the arena. The camera turns and we see
AMA backstage interview,
Mona Darling standing in front of a stairwell.
Mona Darling:
"Hello AMA fans, I’m here backstage before Manifest Destiny goes on the air, bringing you all the backstage happenings here at AMA. Behind me, I have word that Christopher McMichaels is already here in the building which is unusual because he’s always fashionably late according to my sources. So I think it’s time to find out what he’s doing here."
Mona pushes open the door of the stairwell and we see
McMichaels hanging up his phone before turning to see
Mona with a look of shock followed by a mixture of disgust and annoyance.
Christopher McMichaels:
“Oh look who it is, my biggest fan. Look I told you after that last hit piece of an interview that we were done. I don’t have time for “journalists” on your level, so run along before this verges on stalking”
Mona is completely unshaken by the accusations laid upon her from
the Blueblood as she begins to press.
Mona Darling:
“Christopher, I’ve never seen you in the building this early. And you’re making secret phone calls in stairwells now? You can’t expect me not to do my due diligence as a journalist here.”
McMichaels stammers a bit before answering.
Christopher McMichaels:
“Secret what? I was simply on the phone with Wilhelm making sure everything was in order for my big celebration tonight after the big guy and I walk over those two Canadians.”
Mona interrupts before
McMichaels can continue.
Mona Darling:
“Speaking of Canadians, where did this vendetta you seem to have with the country of Canada come from?”
Christopher McMichaels:
“Do you watch the program, Mona? They’ve been sabotaging me from the start! It all started when that dope Brandon Roberts tried to stick his nose in Hamad Agency business, and to top it all off that little rat Jean-Louis had the AUDACITY to ruin the sanctity of a Pure Rules match. PURE RULES Mona, do you understand what that means?”
Mona starts to reply but
McMichaels cuts her off becoming entirely more animated as his rant continues.
Christopher McMichaels:
“There’s nothing pure about that godforsaken country, that’s what it means. It’s too cold, your brain doesn’t develop properly when you spend that much time in below-freezing weather. That’s the only explanation I can come up with for how a country could produce such absolute pests. They call themselves the Northern Touch, but if you ask me, the only ground they need to touch is the frigid wasteland they call a country, and once and for all STAY OUT OF MY BUSINESS!”
Mona finally is able to get a word in.
Mona Darling:
“Umm..are you sure this is just about the Northern Touch? You seem on edge, could this possibly have anything to do with dissension among the Hamad Agency ahead of you teaming with Pariah tonight possibly related to your…alleged jealously of Max Maverick?”
Just then
McMichaels’s own theme song begins to play as his phone begins to ring.
McMichaels has a curious smirk on his face when he sees who’s calling. He turns to
Mona one last time as he opens the door.
Christopher McMichaels:
“Mona, I’m going to put this gently just this once but if you continue to pry into my personal and professional life in this way, you will be hearing from my attorneys. Some things are over your head, just remember that.”
With that,
McMichaels leaves
Mona alone with her cameraman as he heads out.
Mona composes herself before closing off.
Mona Darling:
“Well there you have it AMA Universe, Christopher McMichaels is as charming as ever ahead of his big tag team match tonight at AMA Manifest Destiny where he will team with fellow Hamad Agency member Pariah against the team of The Northern Touch ahead of the tag team turmoil battle later in the night. Don’t forget to buy the show if you haven’t already and be sure to subscribe here to keep up with all the latest happenings within AMA!”