FWA 'Lights Out' (2022) || Card Thread.

[SupineSnake]

Sure thing. Uncle has one too.

 

[Daddy Deville]

Not Dixie's?

Meant the Speculator.

 

[Rosie]

Meant the Speculator.

Spooktacular

 

[Wiseman]

Ext. for me, please.

 

[Bobby Barrows]

I'll take an extension too

 

[SupineSnake]

You got it. AON has one for Lizzie. All handlers in the tag title match have one, also.

Tig also requested an extension on discord. Toner and Black both granted extensions for the main event.

 

[Rosie]

Imagine needing an extension.


This post was made by the early promo gang.

I am kidding, life always comes first.

 

[Oz]

fed is life

 

[WelshyBOI]

I’ll ask for an extension just in case, should hopefully get it done before the deadline though.

 

[Mandalorian]

I’ll ask for an extension just in case, should hopefully get it done before the deadline though.

Unfortunately we cannot offer any extensions for the Spooktacular as promos have already been submitted for that match. Apologies if this causes any issues.

 

[WelshyBOI]

Unfortunately we cannot offer any extensions for the Spooktacular as promos have already been submitted for that match. Apologies if this causes any issues.

No worries…I’ll hopefully get it done.

 

[Rosie]

I was informed that promo feedback was meant to be in the show thread, and challenged by one @The Gipper to say mine for his here. (And I guess @Grimini Killer you are included too <3)

So here, in a spoiler.

Spoiler

Okay, something I did enjoy was the set-up at the beginning and I'm glad you guys used your match result to further the "unlikely tag team" storyline, but at the same time come together at the end after blowing off some steam, having the promo come full circle. Better than just tag team partners in a storyline like yours bicker back and forth. I feel as though each separate part of the promo felt like the continuation of your own stories which is good, although maybe if there is a criticism is that maybe some of the middle of the promo was a bit odd in the tone shift at times with Cole and his interactions with the other characters in his scene (though I guess it is just because I haven't seen much of Reagan Cole for a while now) Also maybe because of how it was formatted I had to double check to make sure I knew when Aka was talking and when it was narration. You know, how there were multiple paragraphs broken up of talking but nothing to really distinguish it beside the quotation mark being far at the end of the second paragraph. Also maybe a little extra polish for the end where they come together could have injected a bit extra impact into the ending. I guess that could have been in part due to the time-crunch near the end and the lack of sleep from you. Those are nit-picks more than anything or just opinion which can be agreed or disagreed on. I think you, Reag have grown leaps and bounds over the years I have seen you write. From a random promo where you asked a kid off the street to randomly be your cameraman after he said "Me mum died" which totally doesn't create a lot of legal questions, to this. Grim, solid work as usual as I have seen from you judging from AMA.

Spoiler: REAL Feedback

Reagan Cole is still Princess Nova's bitch <3

 

[Tommy Bedlam]

@Tiger Princess
You had reached out and asked if I would post some feedback on yours, so I figure I'll start here. Promoing for multiperson matches is hard, especially when it's your first "real" match. I've been there, as I debuted in a Battle Royal. I thought the whole email inviting Vampyra to the match was a clever way to go about talking about a match like this. You don't know who you're facing, so you can't really focus on opponents, but you still managed to get some good content about the match.

“For those in this match wishing to go into the spotlight, be warned! First you must fight through the darkness where I will be waiting. I will be watching carefully."

I really liked that line, especially in context of the title that you chose for the promo. Subtle things like that are usually what speaks to me in a promo.

As far as critiques (and I hate giving these), I did pick up on one or two gramattical mistakes, but nothing of major significance. Honestly, if I didn't work in writing and editing, I probably wouldn't have even noticed them. There were some points where I felt like the opening dialogue got a little long and a bit choppy in some places. I'm attributing that to the fact that you're trying to give us some background on who Vampyra is, so it's totally understandable.

Overall, I really liked this one. Felt like you gave me some reasons that Vampyra wants to win outside of, "I want a title shot." Making people care about a new character is always a hard thing to do, and I feel like you took some major steps in that department here. I'm tuned into what Vampyra is doing.

 

[Tommy Bedlam]

@Comeback Kid

We had briefly talked on the Discord, but I wanted to offer a review on yours as well. I really liked the whole introspective, journal entry idea on this. I feel like sometimes we kinda struggle with how to talk about our characters and their upcoming matches, so this seemed like a fun way to go about it in a different way. I know you had some time constraints that kinda got in the way, but I still felt like this was a quality promo. I like the dynamic of the Summers character absolutely shitting on his opponent and then acknowledging that he's not sure what there is for him if he loses his title.

 

[Oz]

Vampyra: It was nice to see Vampyra's gang/support system/friends/whatever you call it. FWA's been lacking in Joshi department for a while and even the Joshi characters we had in the past didn't reflect the vast joshi world/culture we have today (on the account of being active 6-7 years ago, probably), so its definitely a breath of fresh air the setting/the character/et cetera Vampyra brings into the table. Good to see extensive dialogue from cali hayama, i expect her to be the most prevalent support character for Vampyra (or something like that). Vampyra not being satisfied with winning a jobber match is obviously nothing novel but Ithink it ties nicely to the greed and enthusiasm Vampyra will show in her solo section.

Speaking of:

Good scene description on that part. Set the atmosphere well I think. And like I said Vampyra's enthusiasm about her new workplace, her new environment, her new competition etc. causes her to be upfront and maybe even blunt and I dig it, especially as someone who likes to write characters who scheme. Having someone come and say 'yeah its me im here you didnt expect me to be here well too bad' thats very gucci for me. That enthusiasm continues to come into play as vampyra giddies over the prospects of each title she might win and how she might win those. She wants it all as all rookies do before they learn some valuable lessons .

I didn't exactly get the metaphors that came after that though. Were you trying to incorporate the Halloween spooky decoration into your metaphors? The art pieces, skeletons, darkness, etc. I kinda thought those parts were a little ramble-y for me and didnt exactly tell much. I think its overall still a very solid effort that could've used a better landing but I like it. I like Vampyra and want to see where she goes.